Typical Human Spirit - die, cry, shout and then move on!

Its been sometime now that the Mumbai terror attacks took place. The smoke from the Taj has settled, the debris cleared, the news channels have returned to their regular news along with numerous commercial breaks and the candle lighting has come to a stand still. People have resumed their regular life, even in Mumbai and the outcry from public is rare now.

The few who had decided not to let the steam fizzle, not to let the anger die are being questioned as to why cant they move on with their lives, like every one else has. Maybe people should move on, maybe they shouldn't. I have no real opinion on this but when I read sporadic excerpts from the survivors from that fateful night, I ask myself, can we except them to forget? And if they can't, why should we?

Here is a spine chilling narration from Michael Pollack, general partner of Glenhill Capital. Read this and decide for yourselves if we really can allow ourselves to be so passive that even something like is so soon forgotten.

My story begins innocuously, with a dinner reservation in a world-class hotel. It ends 12 hours later after the Indian army freed us. My point is not to sensationalize events. It is to express my gratitude and pay tribute to the staff of the Taj Mahal Hotel in Mumbai, who sacrificed their lives so that we could survive. They,along with the Indian army, are the true heroes that emerged from this tragedy.

My wife, Anjali, and I were married in the Taj's Crystal Ballroom. Her parents were married there, too, and so were Shiv and Reshma, thecouple with whom we had dinner plans. In fact, my wife and Reshma, both Bombay girls, grew up hanging out and partying the night away there and at the Oberoi Hotel, another terrorist target.

The four of us arrived at the Taj around 9:30 p.m. for dinner at the Golden Dragon, one of the better Chinese restaurants in Mumbai. We were a little early, and our table wasn't ready. So we walked next door to the Harbour Bar and had barely begun to enjoy our beers when the host told us our table was ready. We decided to stay and finish our drinks.

Thirty seconds later, we heard what sounded like a heavy tray smashing to the ground. This was followed by 20 or 30 similar sounds and then absolute silence. We crouched behind a table just feet away from what we now knew were gunmen. Terrorists had stormed the lobby and were firing indiscriminately.

We tried to break the glass window in front of us with a chair, but it wouldn't budge. The Harbour Bar's hostess, who had remained at her post, motioned to us that it was safe to make a run for the stairwell. She mentioned, in passing, that there was a dead body right outside in the corridor. We believe this courageous woman was murdered after we ran away.

(We later learned that minutes after we climbed the stairs, terrorists came into the Harbour Bar, shot everyone who was there and executed those next door at the Golden Dragon. The staff there was equally brave, locking their patrons into a basement wine cellar to protect them. But the terrorists managed to break through and lob in grenades that killed everyone in the basement.)

We took refuge in the small office of the kitchen of another restaurant, Wasabi, on the second floor. Its chef and staff served the four of us food and drink and even apologized for the inconvenience we were suffering.

Through text messaging, e-mail on BlackBerrys and a small TV in the office, we realized the full extent of the terrorist attack on Mumbai.We figured we were in a secure place for the moment. There was also no way out.

At around 11:30 p.m., the kitchen went silent. We took a massive wooden table and pushed it up against the door, turned off all the lights and hid. All of the kitchen workers remained outside; not one staff member had run.

The terrorists repeatedly slammed against our door. We heard them ask the chef in Hindi if anyone was inside the office. He responded calmly: "No one is in there. It's empty." That is the second time the Taj staff saved our lives.

After about 20 minutes, other staff members escorted us down a corridor to an area called The Chambers, a members-only area of the hotel. There were about 250 people in six rooms. Inside, the staff was serving sandwiches and alcohol. People were nervous, but cautiously optimistic. We were told The Chambers was the safest place we could be because the army was now guarding its two entrances and the streets were still dangerous. There had been attacks at a major railway station and a hospital.

But then, a member of parliament phoned into a live newscast and let the world know that hundreds of people--including CEOs, foreigners and members of parliament--were "secure and safe in The Chambers together." Adding to the escalating tension and chaos was the fact that, via text and cellphone, we knew that the dome of the Taj was on fire and that it could move downward. At around 2 a.m., the staff attempted an evacuation. We all lined up to head down a dark fire escape exit. But after five minutes, grenade blasts and automatic weapon fire pierced the air. A mad stampede ensued to get out of the stairwell and take cover back inside The Chambers.

After that near-miss, my wife and I decided we should hide in different rooms. While we hoped to be together at the end, our primary obligation was to our children. We wanted to keep one parent alive.Because I am American and my wife is Indian, and news reports said the terrorists were targeting U.S. and U.K. nationals, I believed I would
further endanger her life if we were together in a hostage situation.

So when we ran back to The Chambers I hid in a toilet stall with a floor-to-ceiling door and my wife stayed with our friends, who fled to a large room across the hall.

For the next seven hours, I lay in the fetal position, keeping in touch with Anjali via BlackBerry. I was joined in the stall by Joe, a Nigerian national with a U.S. green card. I managed to get in touch with the FBI, and several agents gave me status updates throughout the night.

I cannot even begin to explain the level of adrenaline running through my system at this point. It was this hyper-aware state where every sound, every smell, every piece of information was ultra-acute, analyzed and processed so that we could make the best decisions and maximize the odds of survival.

Was the fire above us life-threatening? What floor was it on? Were the commandos near us, or were they terrorists? Why is it so quiet? Did the commandos survive? If the terrorists come into the bathroom and to the door, when they fire in, how can I make my body as small as possible? If Joe gets killed before me in this situation, how can I throw his body on mine to barricade the door? If the Indian commandos liberate the rest in the other room, how will they know where I am? Do the terrorists have suicide vests? Will the roof stand? How can I make sure the FBI knows where Anjali and I are? When is it safe to stand up and attempt to urinate?

Meanwhile, Anjali and the others were across the corridor in a mass of people lying on the floor and clinging to each other. People barely moved for seven hours, and for the last three hours they felt it was too unsafe to even text. While I was tucked behind a couple walls of marble and granite in my toilet stall, she was feet from bullets
flying back and forth. After our failed evacuation, most of the people in the fire escape stairwell and many staff members who attempted to protect the guests were shot and killed.

The 10 minutes around 2:30 a.m. were the most frightening. Rather than the back-and-forth of gunfire, we just heard single, punctuated shots. We later learned that the terrorists went along a different corridor of The Chambers, room by room, and systematically executed everyone: women, elderly, Muslims, Hindus, foreigners. A group huddled next to Anjali was devout Bori Muslims who would have been slaughtered just like everyone else, had the terrorists gone into their room. Everyone was in deep prayer and most, Anjali included, had accepted that their
lives were likely over. It was terrorism in its purest form. No one was spared.

The next five hours were filled with the sounds of an intense grenade/gun battle between the Indian commandos and the terrorists. It was fought in darkness; each side was trying to outflank the other.

By the time dawn broke, the commandos had successfully secured our corridor. A young commando led out the people packed into Anjali's room. When one woman asked whether it was safe to leave, the commando replied: "Don't worry, you have nothing to fear. The first bullets have to go through me."

The corridor was laced with broken glass and bullet casings. Every table was turned over or destroyed. The ceilings and walls were littered with hundreds of bullet holes. Blood stains were everywhere, though, fortunately, there were no dead bodies to be seen.

A few minutes after Anjali had vacated, Joe and I peeked out of our stall. We saw multiple commandos and smiled widely. I had lost my right shoe while sprinting to the toilet so I grabbed a sheet from the floor, wrapped it around my foot and proceeded to walk over the debris to the hotel lobby.

Anjali and I embraced for the first time in seven hours in the Taj's ground floor entrance. I didn't know whether she was dead or injured because we hadn't been able to text for the past three hours. I wanted to take a picture of us on my BlackBerry, but Anjali wanted us to get out of there before doing anything.

She was right--our ordeal wasn't completely over. A large bus pulled up in front of the Taj to collect us and, just about as it was fully loaded, gunfire erupted again. The terrorists were still alive and firing automatic weapons at the bus. Anjali was the last to get on the bus, and she eventually escaped in our friend's car. I ducked under some concrete barriers for cover and wound up the subject of photos that were later splashed across the media. Shortly thereafter, an ambulance came and drove a few of us to safety. An hour later, Anjali and I were again reunited at her parents' home. Our Thanksgiving had just gained a lot more meaning.

Some may say our survival was due to random luck, others might credit divine intervention. But 72 hours removed from these events, I can assure you only one thing: Far fewer people would have survived if it weren't for the extreme selflessness shown by the Taj staff, who organized us, catered to us and then, in the end, literally died for us. They complemented the extreme bravery and courage of the Indian commandos, who, in a pitch-black setting and unfamiliar, tightly packed terrain, valiantly held the terrorists at bay.

It is also amazing that, out of our entire group, not one person screamed or panicked. There was an eerie but quiet calm that pervaded--one more thing that got us all out alive. Even people in adjacent rooms, who were being executed, kept silent.It is much easier to destroy than to build, yet somehow humanity has managed to build far more than it has ever destroyed. Likewise, in a period of crisis, it is much easier to find faults and failings rather than to celebrate the good deeds. It is now time to commemorate our heroes.

When we all got together

We had the most amazing turn out at Major Unnikrishnan's Prayer Service held at The Frank Anthony Public School, Bangalore, on 5th December, 2008. Alumni and non-alumni turned up in a large number and the ceremony itself was hugely emotional. I will elaborate on the same in my next post, but first, here is something that I had circulated to all present there and want to share it here as well.




Dear Fellow Alumni,

It is indeed overwhelming to know that we have been strongly moved by the courage and valor of Major Sandeep Unnikrishnan and that we all realize that the brave soldier gave up his life to save our own.

We would never know what it took for the brave souls that fateful night to stare the terrorists in their eyes, face their bullets and not care about their own lives. None of us sitting safe here would ever know what it means for a soldier to chase death in order to save millions whom he doesn’t even know.

But all of us sitting here can acknowledge and respect the cause for which Major Sandeep Unnikrishnan and other brave hearts fought to death – the cause of Fighting Terrorism. And all of us here can pledge that we will stand up for this cause in whatever way is possible.

War or hatred or finger pointing is not the answer. Being a RESPONSIBLE CITIZEN is.

If each one of us can resolve to be responsible, resolve to not lead passive lives and resolve to contribute to our society, we can ensure that more brave soldiers would not need to lay their lives in vain.

Being responsible does not mean changing our lives, it just means changing our attitudes.

On this day, when we have come together to pray for the bravest amongst us, let us pay tribute to him by resolving that each one of us will be responsible;

• Let us respect each and ever security personnel at Airports, Offices etc and allow them to do their jobs, even if it takes two minutes more of our time.

• Let us curb hatred. Terrorists do not belong to any religion/ any place. There is nothing we will gain by hating other communities or religions.

• Let us not add to corruption any more. Even if it means getting a ticket, let us resolve to go the right way instead of the easy way.

• Let us spread awareness and education amongst the less fortunate. Start with the house maid, her kids, but realize that education is the best weapon we can equip anyone with.

• Let us make sure we Vote. Even if it means casting the 49-0 vote, we should Vote.

• Let us not exploit anyone and also not allow anyone to exploit us. If it means not paying the auto guy extra but waiting for another honest one to come after 10mins, so be it.

• Let us never forget what happened on 26/11in Mumbai so that we never allow the authorities to forget either. We should never let them forget what their callousness has resulted in and that we will not tolerate their irresponsibility anymore or fall prey to their ineptness

Each one of us can make a difference – we have heard that and ignored that long enough. Its time now to believe in it, act on it and thus pay real tribute to those who had to give up their lives to wake us up. It indeed is Now or Never.

Badge we can all wear

Thank you for wearing white

My phone kept beeping last evening and one after the other, there were messages pouring in asking people to wear White on 1st December, today.

I ignored the first, I ignored the second but after the third, it got me thinking. To begin with, I realized, each sms had come from friends from different cities which meant that people across the nation were probably all willing to endorse this gesture.

What I was dismissing initially as some pop-gesture struck me as the first opportunity to show unity with friends and people in general. So I quickly took out my phone and sent a message to everyone on my phone list asking them to wear white - not as a mark of mourning, but as a display of resolution - our resolution to stand united and demand peace, our resolution to not give up this time, not as yet, not for a long time to come.

I woke up this morning and saw some responses that exactly matched my initial reaction to wearing white. People messaged me saying they did not want to subscribe to such lip service, telling me that nothing will happen by wearing white, that no change will come by wearing white. Last evening I might have agreed, but this morning was different for me.

I decided not to argue with those who did not want to subscribe to me plea, not to try convince them, not to make a big deal of this. My objective of wearing white and passing on the message was the same as is for writing this blog - to act upon my convictions and if people fall in line, great, if not, someday they will.

I put on my white and as I walked into office, I saw colleague after colleague, all in white, smiling at me with that knowing look of "we all DO share the sentiment and we all are pained with the loss". As I walked into office, I knew my decision to pass on the message was right and that people ARE willing to unite for a cause.

Thank you all for wearing white. No change has come about today by having done so. Deshmukh did not resign because we wore white. The Patils did not step down because we wore white. But wearing white brought a sense of re-assurance and encouragement to me and maybe others.

Re-assurance that whatever said and done, there is a possibility of uniting for a cause, that there is a chance that we all might forget our personal opinions and biases, that peace still has hope.

If the few of us hadn't worn white today to show solidarity, I would have thought it is going to be an uphill task getting people aligned. Because if people cannot do something as small and trivial as wear White, if they have to have an opinion even on this, then how are we ever going to fall in line for bigger things tomorrow, even though we have all sworn that we will bring about the change that is so badly required in the country.

Wearing white was not as significant as knowing that this time, it is not a lost battle we are willing to fight.

Thank you all for wearing white. Today this has been a beginning. Tomorrow this is going to bring the revolution we all want to see and someday, white will prevail, peace will win.

Its been 4 days now since the ghastly terror attacks began. Absolutely all news channels covered the tragedy 24/7 without a commercial break. The entire country watched non-stop and almost even bragged about how they have been following the events diligently.

My eyes are now on the clock. I'm wondering how long it will be before everything returns back to normal and we forget all the angst and the anger and get absorbed in our daily humdrum again. I am wondering because the past says this is what happens all the time.

Every time there is a national calamity, India suddenly comes together and makes empty promises of doing something about it, about not letting things go by easily. Every time disaster hits the nation, media takes the mantle to lead the show but then looses track almost immediately. Every time we are faced with tragedy, we talk and then we forget.

Will we do the same this time around as well? Will we continue living helplessly and will we continue the numb existence even now? I know we will all say NO right now because the anger is alive right now. Right now we are all enraged/ aggrieved and hurt. Right now we all feel for what has happened and therefore right now, we all want to do something.

But change doesn't happen over night, does it? Revolutions don't come about just like that. Such things require time and slow and steady working. Such things require long term unity, diligence and patience. So now I ask us again, are we going to do anything about this? Do we have it in us to bring about the change and the revolution that is actually required?

Chances are we will all wonder "But what can we do?". Well I think there are things we can do - small things but meaningful things, things that will bring about a change slowly but surely.

We can all start with NOT FORGETTING what has just happened. We should NOT let this angst, this anger fizzle out. We should not fall prey to our own weakness of "going with the flow" this time around. Why should only those who have suffered be the only ones to remember this? Do we also have to go through a personal loss to then remember tragedies like these?

I think not. Enough has happened for us to keep this alive. Only if we keep this memory alive, will we be resolute about making India a better and a safer place to live in. Only if we remember all those innocent lives taken in this brutal act of terrorism, will we want to be a part of the slow revolution that is sure to take place.

So remember we must and to make sure we do that, I for one will try and write as much and as often on this forum as possible. I am not expecting any of us to dedicate our lives to this cause - we are not Gandhis - but we surely can spare half an hour or so thinking about this everyday.

I will make sure I don't let this die inside me and I hope others agree with me and do the same.

I will continue writing on http://thejarbag.blogspot.com/ and request everyone to pour their thoughts as well on the platform. Today, we have the power of the Web - lets make the RIGHT use of it. It is not in vain when they say "Together we CAN make a difference". Like every drop counts, every thought counts and maybe thought after thought from our collective thinking will lead to something, someday.

A true Tribute - Tears and Fears or a real Awakening?

Like the whole country, I have been glued to the TV from the time the traumatic saga started. Like the whole country, my heart bled for all the innocent lives that were lost in this savage act of inhumanity. And like the whole country, today, I am feeling not only proud but also thankful to our men in uniform for risking their lives for our safety.

But I am not sure if I am with the a lot of the country in the "show of sympathy" that actually is a "show of apathy".

I woke up this morning to realize that Major Sandeep Unnikrishnan was in the same school as I was and I in fact, remember seeing him in school. There was a grand report from our principal about how Sandeep was an outstanding student, an all rounder and someone to be proud of.

Immediately various ex-students started sending messages to each other to hold a payer service for the brave soul. Suddenly, there have been calls to and fro asking each other if they really remember Sandeep from school. Suddenly, there are conversations about how "i knew him" and "we did this" and "we did that".

What is wrong with us? Are we so pathetic that we latch on to anything for our 2 minutes of fame amongst our own peers?

In the last 10 years of me having left my school, any conversation around school has only been around Lara Dutta but never around anyone who might have joined the army because he was driven by patriotism. It is true that it takes death for most of us to remember a person and appreciate his worth but does this also mean that we count on such deaths to feel important about ourselves?

Can we, for a minute, give a thought to the nature of this death? This brave man fought terrorists face to face, took bullets in his body and saved his colleague's life before he gave his own. Such a death does not need sympathies for the martyr but requires an awakening for the cause.

Major Sandeep had wanted to fight for his country from the time he was a child. Major Sandeep had wanted to contribute to this country. Major Sandeep had been ready to give up his family and pleasures of young age to do something extra ordinary that 99% of us do not have the courage to even dream of.

Major Sandeep does not need our sympathies. Major Sandeep needs our support for the cause that he fought for and died for.

As does Mr. Hemant Karkare who also laid his life for the safety of all ours. It is scary to know that the head of ATS is no more, scary to realize that the brain behind ATS is no more and scary to imagine what might happen to all the progress he had made in the other terror attacks so far.

But there is no point being scared of what might happen and watching TV all day as mark of homage to the dead. Is this all we can do? Everyone has been asking on various forums about what can we do?

Well, there is substantial amount of stuff we can do!

For one, we can ensure that the media and the authorities do not forget the ATS Chief's un-finished work and compel them to continue his work and finish it with the same honesty and diligence that Mr. Hemant Karkare had been doing it till now. We must ensure that we do not let the authorities drop investigations behind the Malegaon blasts and let the corrupt and sick minded politicians win and benefit from this martyr's death.

Mrs. Karkare had expressed her anger with BJP and rightfully so. We can support her by not supporting such political elements that give rise to communal hatred.

I don't even know if Mr. Hemant Karkare fell prey to the terrorists or to an opportunistic political ploy where maybe, someone else killed him at the right time and at the right place. After all, he was being given death threats and was being condoned by Advani and the likes.

Just in case this might have been the reality, who's responsibility would it be to get justice? I usually don't imagine the regular junta to have the time, patience or inclination in matters as these but I also know that if we put our minds to it, we can get justice done.

After all, it was the 'aam junta' that got together after years of Jessica Lal's killing and got her real justice. So can we not get together for this, unite to fight against terror for our own safety, by ensuring that we create enough noise and pressure for the authorities to do only the right thing from now on?

Brave men have died in Mumbai. Brave men had died in Kargil. Brave men die every second day on the border. We might not be brave enough to give our lives but we can be human enough to give little time, little thought and a conscious effort towards this cause. We can keep these memories alive and make sure we do not take our eyes off from what the authorities are doing and ensure we are a part of a better India, a safer India.

Cut the emotional crap

60 long hours. Possibly the 60 longest hours for many. And a whole nation struck numb.

This seems to be the reality of the worst terror attacks of the century ever. Top cops have laid their lives, hundreds of innocent people have died, hundreds of families broken, children orphaned and millions right now feeling emotional and enraged.

Stories are frantically being filed on the web world about traumatic experiences of those who suffered and those who saw others suffer. News papers are filled with possible anecdotes of the survivors and those who spent long hours in anticipation of their probable end.

I am sitting in Bangalore and only being able to watch TV and read the papers to know whats happening to my own people in Mumbai. My younger brother lives in Colaba and frequents Leopold often. He is safe. I am happy but I am not relieved. My blood froze when the papers detailed out Sabina's last sms to her husband that read "they are in my bath room".

With no exaggeration, I had tears in my eyes when I read that one of the Taj interns was shot down by the terrorist who had been imposing as an intern at the hotel for the last few months. The words of this dying young boy to his family over the phone were "my friend has shot me".

My heart filled with pride not only when the brave men in uniform went into the clutches of death only to do their duty but also when an ordinary white collared Taj GM did his duty all the while his own family was burning to death.

There are and will be hundreds of spine chilling stories that will be the only remnants of this tragedy, which in itself is a tragedy. Yes, we need to KNOW what has happened but there is more we also need to FEEL about what has happened.

Getting emotional and praying for those who lost their lives and their worlds is weak. Lighting candles and maintaining 2 minutes silence if superficial. Praising Mumbai and its spirit for not having altered their course of life despite facing the most beastly attack on humanity is expected.

But is this all we are capable of doing? Is there nothing else we feel or are capable of feeling?

Like all others, I am not sure what I am supposed to feel when I hear on TV that there is unfinished dinner still on plates of dead diners in the ruins of Taj, that the floors are filled with blood and that they still cannot ascertain the number of casualties.

I am not sure how I am supposed to react when I realize that the brave Unnikrishnan was actually in the same school as I and that I was in 9th when he was the house captain and as a junior, I had looked up to him and hoped that one day even I would become the school captain too.

I don't know how to react to such piece of information but I do know that I feel something, something more than just sympathy and pity.

Look at these pictures (http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2008/11/mumbai_under_attack.html) and tell me if I am wrong in feeling anger. Tell me if I am wrong in feeling that we all need to do something about this. Tell me if I am wrong in realizing the futility of our own lives when we face something as abominable as this and yet are helpless?

This is as close as we can get to the feared clutches of terrorism and even if this does not move us in wanting to stand united against terrorism, then possibly nothing will.

And yes, that brings us to, what can we do? We - the educated, sensible, thinking individuals that comprise the minority of the society, we who have decided to live in sanitized environments, we who have so far been FEELING for various atrocious attacks being made on mankind but we who have so far done nothing.

What can we do? I think, to begin with, lets stop getting emotional and start thinking rational. Ask ourselves, do we deserve democracy? Do we deserve to be ruled by uneducated third rate gundas? Well, if no, then lets stand together and demand for a Military rule that is not governed by any party, any religion or any caste.

A Military rule might make our lives a bit less exciting and fun but it will at least make our lives safer. Military rule might impose strict rules and laws on the lives of the affluent, but it will make the lives of less fortunate safer. Don't we want that? Are we so selfish that we cannot see the pain and trauma that "they" go through?

The men in uniform have proven time and again that they are only ones worth trusting our lives with. Whether it be Kargil or Mumbai, the men in uniform have risked their lives for our peace. And men who can do that are men we should trust. Not our opportunistic politicians who leave no situation un-touched, how ever grave it might be.

I shudder to think that maybe LK Advani will be our next PM and its is SHAMEFUL for me to be ruled by a man who is solely responsible for Babri Masjid and its aftermath till date. It is SHAMEFUL for me to know that either I don't vote or vote mindlessly. It is SHAMEFUL for me to face the fact that despite all the progress, we the thinking individuals place such little thought in the matters of our country.

I want to do something about this. I want to be a part of making India safer for the 'aam junta'. I want Military Rule imposed for the next 1 year, because to my mind that seems to be the only solution.